it's a cold&lonely night. ):

there's one thing about me. once my impression of someone changes, i'll view them in a different light. i'm not a good wayang actress, putting on a mask above those thick layers of makeup. my feelings towards people are blatant. i wont act chummy and as though nothing is wrong when, Something is actually wrong. it's just hard to smile and be the same once things are different.

once Trust is broken, it's hard to stitch it back. the vulnerabilty of it all.

yet ironically, i'm the kind who's gullible enough to forget, and start afresh. it's not pretending that the past doesnt exist, it's just hoping that things would get better. and it's not putting on a facade, acting that i'm alright with you when there's a taint. rather, it's just wishing that we could start afresh.

too simpleminded, check. letting guard down too easily, check. unaware of other's manipulation, check. remind me, i need to uncheck those.

sigh, i just hate the way people act one way infront of certain people. and another at the back.
actually, i feel even sadder for the people who are still kept in the dark.

but if this is the way to survive in society,
can someone please pass the full battle armour?
thankyou.

my blog will be an avenue for me to write about issues; abeit vague.
so everyone please, do write your comments in the Heartless popup box at the end of the entry, or at the flooble board. -points to the left.

so today's entry will be about, Eyes.
so here goes. (:

and they say, "the eyes are the windows to the soul". i never knew a person's eyes could be used to tell so much about a person. my church friends once pointed out i had Precious Moments eyes. i remembered asking them why, but i cant remember the reason now. hoho. esther's mum during this year's PTM told Esther that i had nice eyes. even though it was just a passing glance as i walked down the overhead bridge. ernest told aaron that after certain stuffs happened, my eyes sortof lost it's gleam. don just told me before training last friday that i had emo eyes.

EH. i never knew my eyes could tell stories! i'm not trying to say that i've nice eyes or whatsoever. in the first place, how do you Rate a person's eyes?!

so i guess it must be true. how eyes are powerful enough to convey your feelings.

dancing sparkling eyes;
that mischevous glint of spark.
down forlorn eyes;
shifty blinking eyes;
doesnt those words conjure up an image of how people might actually be feeling?

Neuro-notes I. Suddenly narrowed or slitted eyes may reveal disagreement or uncertainty. A quick tightening of the eye-orbital muscles (i.e., of the orbicularis oculi, which we tense to show pain [Prkachin and Craig 1995]) hides much of our iris and eyeball behind lowered hoods. Negative feelings associated with doubt or misunderstanding (i.e., cognitive dissonance) quickly pass from the limbic system to the hindbrain's facial nucleus (cranial VII), which triggers a brief narrowing of the eyes as if to protect against emotional "pain."- (David B. Givens/Center for Nonverbal Studies)

ahh, not forgetting the tears flowing down from one's eyes.
Tears of Pain&Sorrow.
Tears of Happiness.
Tears of Fear.
Tears of Disappointment.
all these, to do with the eyes.

you know how possible it is for one to put on a facade.
but it's pretty tough for a person to reveal happiness in their eyes when they're sad.

so the point of this entry is that,
Eyes do not lie. (: